In my opinion, a “game” is any
strategy, tactic or maneuver designed to obstruct, hinder or prevent
the formation of intimacy within a relationship.
In most instances, the name of
the game is NOT to name the game.
When you name the game, you
ungame the game.
When you ungame the game, you no
longer have to play the game.
When you decide not to play the
game, you don’t have to make any points to see who will win or who
will lose the game.
The problem with most games is
they can be enormous fun to play!
Games and their associated rules,
roles and even secrets are often part of the magical draw.
When people play games, there is
typically a “buzz” in the air.
The atmosphere bristles with
excitement that something is about to happen.
And if one is lucky, maybe it
will happen to them. Perhaps a little. Perhaps a lot.
The games people play provide one
methodology for occupying space and time (like zero does with
A game can be expressed, so that
each person in the game knows all the rules.
A game can also be implied, so
that each person in the game does not know all the rules.
A game can be both expressed and
implied so that each person in the game can essentially make up the
rules to suit their needs and purposes as the game continues.
If the context within which any
of these games are played is marriage, then the only sure-fire
conclusion one can make is that the marriage is a game!